More and more Hindus are speaking up; as I mentioned yesterday, I have received calls from a few Hindus, Christians, and Muslims. It appears that they were waiting for the Dept of State to speak up, for them to open up as if they were waiting for their permission to be righteous.
You’ll find the poem linked below to reflect the common-sense view of most Indians, even if they are silent. The other day, Dr. Abdullah and Dr. Zafar Iqbal were in the Hindu Temple in Maryland to enjoy the Hasiya Kavi Sammelan program. I am a life member of the Antra Rashtriya Hindi Samiti – that is the International Hindi committee, it appears that they have misplaced my name.
Occasionally, the poets took a dig at Modi – that was not the good news; it was the claps that came from the audience – that gave hope. Of course, only 22% of the net Hindu population subscribes to the extremists Hindu ideology, the majority like any majority usually are not loaded with hatred for others.
All the Indian Muslims and Christians have to do is strengthen our relationships with the 78%. Muslims need to be assertively a part of everything about India’s social, civil, and political life. If we need to bitch, we need to bitch at ourselves for not being a part of society. We went there to be a part of the Indian diaspora that enjoys Hindi and Urdu Poetry. It was good to see the openness there, the program MC spoke in Urdu, which is also a common man’s Hindi. One of the poets was introduced with a comment to enjoy her poetry in Urdu, and she did well with that.
The Indian Muslims are making a lot of effort to restore the lost relationships we had with fellow Indians who are Hindus. Aligarh Alumni does very well in that field. Razi Raziuddin’s weekly program on diaspora is a good example to bring Indians Together. I had organized many programs with a specific purpose of coming together so we all can see eye to eye, which was lost since Modi came into power. We have another group called Indians together and you are welcome to join our WhatsApp group, Indians Together – we are Hindus, Dalits, Muslims, Christians, Sikhs, and Jains. We hope to have Buddhists and others that will make complete Indian representation. We all have done well being civil in the group.
It is not easy to hear about the destruction of our motherland in every aspect of society, economy, jobs, the standard of living, democracy, religious freedom, and human rights. Some of us who lack empathy run away from it, but imagine those who are being lynched, prevented from going to school because they wear a Hijab, that they have worn for over 1000 years. If they can endure the harassment and lynching, and the call for genocide by the religious fanatics among Hindus, we can at least learn about it and not run from it.
No Hindus should be shy about what the extremists do, it is not them. The Muslims have learned that ISIS and Alqaeda do not represent them and don’t need to apologize. The same goes with the Hindus, they don’t need to be embarrassed about what the extremists Hindus do, instead, they should condemn their acts.
Can I appeal to Muslims and Christians to have your presence and re-build a gradual relationship with Hindus? In the end, the safety of all comes from knowing each other. Quran has one of the most potent verses for building cohesive societies, 49:13. Maybe I need to do a zoom meeting on just his one verse.
While I was surfing Facebook, I came across the following video and I loved it. It reflects the views of a majority of Indians and I have written a similar poem on the subject of adharma in India.
Mike GhouseComments Off on Sudhir Chaudhary Zee TV Anchor
I watched this guy, Sudhir Chaudhry, for the first time. He has a few points but principally speaking for BJP – to pit one Indian against the other to have political gains for the BJP – the Indian political party in governance now.
He says 1.9 Billion Muslims are together, whereas 1 billion Hindus are not. He is wrong on both counts. Of course, his followers believe whatever he says, but he won’t stand if subjected to facts.
He says Muslims are concerned about Muslims elsewhere – aren’t Hindus concerned? HAF takes up the cause of Hindus in Bangladesh, Pakistan, Afghanistan, and other nations. We should be concerned about all life, and I have stood up for every community including Hindus. http://standingupforothers.blogspot.com/2012/04/standing-with-hindus.html
Does he say the party is not the same as the government? Who is he talking to?
He cited Ambedkar at the end – Ambedkar talked about different Muslims, not Indian Muslims. I need to read that book to ensure this guy is telling the truth.
Much of the non-sense like Darul Harb and Darul Aman, Ghazwa-e-Hind had penetrated the psyche of a few conservative Muslims, and Maududi flipped Islam from the religion of living in harmony with fellow humans to a religion of politics, power, and ruling others.
The Muslims must reject those non-sensical theories and follow the Quran, the common sense guidance book. No one can go wrong with the Quran. As a Muslim, I leave all the books written by Muslim scholars and stick with the Quran, provided we vigorously debate the meaning of the verses. We should not reduce God to a small person; his words are words of wisdom, and all of us, the 7.5 billion of us, are his creation. He does not discriminate against anyone.
Islam is guidance to live a peaceful life with fellow humans. Islam never meant to rule others. Islam was guidance for us to be exemplary citizens – the Amin. Prophet (pbuh) did not run a theocratic state; it was a pluralistic state, where every religious community lived by the rules of the tribe or their religion. We need to make corrections on our part and not worry about what others say but worry about what God would say.
As a Muslim, the only Islamic book I revere, love, admire and speak about is the Quran – none of the other books matter to me. In Islam, Bukhari is not superior to any one of you, but you admire him for his effort. But his word is not above the Quran. We are all equal.
Every Muslim should know his Quran – you don’t need certification from Al-Azhar or another institution. The prophet said he was leaving this book and suggested reading, understanding, and following to live as an Amin, and exemplary citizen.
Mike GhouseComments Off on Al-Qaeda threatens India
Terror group Al-Qaeda has threatened to carry out suicide attacks in different parts of India over the recent remarks made by a few BJP leaders on Prophet Muhammad.
Indian Muslims did not join the terrorist groups Al-Qaeda and ISIS when others were joining them from different places. And now, when Al-Qaeda threatens to attack their motherland, Indian Muslims not only condemn them but will resist them from entering the Indian soil.
Indian Muslims and Christians are exemplary communities. They believe in non-violence and have lived up to it. Since 2014, Muslims have endured nearly 200 lynchings and harassed their girls for wearing Hijab, and prevented from going to school. The extremist Hindutva (Not Hindu) elements chased fruits and vegetable vendors to earn their livelihood. Their homes were bulldozed, and the Hindu saints and sadhus called for a Genocide of Indian Muslims. The extremists barge into Christian homes and churches and regularly harassed them. These extremists cannot be Hindus, and I urge the mainstream Hindus to speak out against them, as it would reflect on them and their religion.
What would you have done if forced to the corner? Would you have at least entertained the idea of retaliation?
Muslims chose to endure the pain, their belief in the goodness of the moderate Hindu majority to take over the nation and put India back where everyone minds their own business. What your wear and how you pray, eat, and drink is your business.
Mike GhouseComments Off on Hindu-Muslim Marriage and Application of Pluralism
For a long time, Muslim men married women of the book–Jews, Christians, and Muslims (Abrahamic), while Muslim women rarely married outside Islam. Likewise, Hindus married only within their faith or sometimes to others from the Dharmic (Buddhist, Jain, and Sikh) traditions. These norms are changing; American Muslim women are marrying non-Muslim men.
In America today, according to the Pew and Dr. Amin’s surveys (38% Hindu, 45% Muslim), about 40% of Hindus, Muslims and others marry interfaith. This trend is gaining momentum. This article is written to promote pluralism and equality in Hindu-Muslim marriages in America.
The increased interfaith marriages are due to globalization and the secularization of societies. Today’s young Hindus and Muslims who grew up as minorities in American schools or at the workplace are continually exposed to each other spend time together studying, dining, and working, and sometimes falling in love.
Initially, faith is not a consideration in their relationship, but it becomes an issue when the couple decides to get married. Lovers have no filters, but parents and societies do. Parents are not at fault either; they cannot fathom the relationship because they grew up in closed-minded societies with historical conflicts between Hindus and Muslims.
Scriptures
It is said that if God did not want a Muslim-Hindu marriage, it would have been said in the Quran or Geeta. God does not make mistakes; instead, he empowers us to figure out our own equilibrium. Further, the Quran calls there is no compulsion in matters of faith.[Quran 2:256]
“And among His signs is that He created mates for you from among yourselves (it could mean a Muslim as well a Hindu) so that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed love and compassion between you. In these are signs for people who reflect.” [Quran 30:21]
Indeed, the Quran is a universal book of guidance for Muslims; it does not say God puts love between two Muslims but two humans as if He has installed magnetic attraction between two individuals that bring them together. Therefore, there is no reason to believe the Quran will restrict the marriage of a Muslim to a Hindu (where “Hindu” should mean the person will remain the same after the marriage and till death). India’s renowned poet Ghalib writes that love happens; no one starts out saying I want to love this person. There is no reason or rhyme for falling in love.
Fundamental religious beliefs between Islam and other faiths (read 1, 2) could certainly bring complexities to many interfaith couples. Most Islamic communities believe that a marriage must be “accepted” by Allah. For this reason, a Muslim would expect the non-Muslim spouse to convert to Islam before an Islamic wedding ceremony, the Nikah. This practice (expectation of conversion of the non-Muslim spouse for Nikah) can be challenged based on today’s pluralistic worldview.
The same can be said for orthodox Christian or Catholic communities for asking for conversion prior to a church wedding. A Hindu may not ask the Muslim intended spouse to convert to Hinduism but will certainly want him or her to follow certain Hindu practices.
It is also important to understand Quran 2:221, “Do not marry women who associate others with Allah (polytheists, idolaters), until they believe in Allah. A believing bonded woman is better than a woman who associates others with Allah, even if she pleases you. Do not marry men who associate others with Allah until they believe in Allah. A believing bonded man is better than a man who associates others with Allah, even if he pleases you…”
This verse is cited to compel conversion before marriage, but it simply says that compatibility is the key to the success of any marriage. God loves harmony among his creation, particularly the married couples. In the above verse, the wisdom of the Quran emphasizes compatibility and suggests marrying a person who is on the same wavelength as you are, rather than a person with a conflicting belief.
We need to understand the essence of God’s wisdom rather than the literal text (for example, Allah and Ishvar), as the words do expand and shrink in meaning. Everyone is a believer, whether you are a Muslim, Pagan or Hindu, as far you do believe in accountability of your karma (or action). Even atheists have their beliefs. Atheists of today are responsible and accountable for their actions, sometimes more than some religious people.
In Islam, there is a prohibition on the marriage of Muslims to polytheists or idolatresses. However, Hindus are not polytheists nor idol-worshipers. They have the liberty to express the God by many names and forms, as is clearly expressed in Rig Veda; as Ekam sat, vipra bahudha vadanti (there is only one Truth, but expressed in various ways). The forms and names are options available to a Hindu but are not mandatory. A practicing Hindu may not use any form or name of God while meditating but may want to use an iconic representation of God (murti) during pooja (worship).
The authors will leave interpretations of scriptural statements to the couple in love.
Pluralism in Interfaith Marriage
In today’s pluralistic and secular society, especially in America, religion is increasingly becoming personal in nature and applicable to the believers of that faith. However, a Hindu-Muslim couple will find resistance from parents and communities for the way they may wish to run their married life or raise children.
In the past, every Hindu or Muslim society preferred their daughters to marry within the faith, believing that it would prevent divorce and the risk of their daughters returning to their homes. These rules were framed when women did not work and depended on their parents or husbands for sustenance in the South Asian societies. But today in America, most women are independent and take care of themselves and probably will not be a “burden” to their parents.
People are conditioned to think in binary terms – Halal or Haram, Zero and One, Day and Night, Black and White, and they are comfortable with it. No tradition wants to lose a member of their culture to the other, whether you are a Hindu or Muslim. For these reasons, these two societies will not allow a Hindu-Muslim couple to marry without hassle.
In conservative Muslim countries, an imam may not perform the Islamic Nikah without conversion (Shahadah) of the Hindu party, however, in America, a progressive Imam would perform Islamic Nikah without conversion of the Hindu party. To avert the marital gridlock, sometimes a Hindu may fake-convert. Young adults should understand that any religious commitment for marriage is not a hollow ritual. It has deep meaning and consequences. Fake conversion could also have legal consequences, especially during child-custody battles during a potential divorce proceeding. Instead of a fake conversion, it is better to be truthful and honest (truthfulness is emphasized over 75 times in the Quran, it is one of the central values of Islam), especially when other options are available, meaning a “Hindu” can marry a Muslim without conversion.
If a Hindu-Muslim couple manages to have an in-depth conversation with their parents as adults, or seek guidance from an interfaith Marriage officiant, or a marriage counselor, others may come together to support the couple. Invariably, even if the parents are reluctant initially, they will come together when they have their grandchildren. America brings positive changes to every American, especially when there is an intention to share and respect equality from both sides.
God is within us. He is “closer to us than our jugular veins” (Quran 50:16), meaning He is aware of what goes on with us. No one in the family or workplace would ever question the rituals you follow on the toilet seat. Why should they question how you pray? America is a land of liberty and freedom. The Hindu-Muslim couple can always think outside the box. Parents, too, may ultimately come to accept when they see that their children are happy. Happiness is indeed the bottom line for all parents.
Real-world Issues
Getting married is only the start of a long-married life journey. Further, in all practical sense, marriage is not only a marriage of two individuals but, to a large extent, an alliance of two extended families and cultures. If Hindu and Muslim parents and close families are at odds or cannot stand each other in one room for two hours, that will inevitably bring major problems in a couple’s life later.
A couple’s happiness is based on how they manage their married life affairs. Lack of communication is one of the reasons for divorce. There are many additional difficulties the Hindu-Muslim couple can expect to face.
Coming now to the logistics, a Hindu-Muslim couple must pay attention to many unique aspects. A partial list is given below. Many of the points below are binary, thus leaving a limited room for “both ways” or “a middle way” as wished by pluralists or seculars.
How will you get married? Will it be is Islamic Nikah, Hindu Vivaha, civil wedding, or an interfaith wedding with both traditions giving fullness to their relationship?
Does the Hindu party have to take Shahadah (conversion) before Nikah? Will the Muslim party also formally convert to Hinduism for Vivaha?
Will Hindu party be asked to accept a new Islamic name?
Will there be any expectation of change in the dress code (hijab, sari or bindi)?
Will there be any restriction against performing namaz or pooja in the home or for displaying a photo of Kaaba or murti of Lord Ganesh in the living room?
What will be names of children, will that be Muslim, Hindu, or none of these?
Will children have circumcision (sunnat)?
How will children be raised? What religion would they follow? Will that be only one faith, both faiths or none?
Will children visit both, only one or none of two religious institutions?
Will your children be taught from the Quran and Geeta, only one or none?
Will children celebrate both religious holidays, from only one faith or none?
Will your family eat a meat-based or vegetarian-only diet?
Will there be any restriction on alcoholic beverages in the home?
Would you visit and donate to both, only one or none of two religious’ institutions?
How would you insulate your spouse from your parents when necessary?
When societies look down upon you, how will you manage outsiders?
When you visit relatives in an Islamic country, that country may not approve your non-Islamic wedding or a Muslim-Hindu marriage and may decline the visa. How will you manage such legal issues, including those related to inheritance?
Will you or your children be buried Islamic way or cremated as per Hindu rites? Sorry, both or none are not an option here!
Two bolded items, children’s name and their religion are the most important points on this list.
On many of the above points, a true pluralistic couple will decide to do both ways; for example, to teach children from Geeta and Quran. An exclusivist supremacist person will impose his or her religious ideology on their spouse and will propose to settle for only one of two or three ways. Those couples not ready to face reality now may opt for neither of two religious options. It is ultimately the couple’s choice how to run their private life.
How many of these above decisions are made to please one party over the other? Is there a good equality and consideration from both parties? If the couple cannot find any agreement on any of the above points, it is good to pause and reexamine their commitment to interfaith marriage.
Concluding Remarks
Even in the best of marriages, the spouse’s religious beliefs and commitment and acceptance by parents can bring conflicts during married life. The strength of one’s religious beliefs evolves over the years as one approaches marriageable age, more when the couple reaches the parental stage and even more so when they reach the retirement age. It is hoped that all young Hindu-Muslim couples contemplating marriage will find this article helpful in thinking through the additional complexities due to religion.
Pluralism is respecting the otherness of the other, including faith, political belief, and the culture of others. It is about admiring the goodness in others without asking them to be your copycat. Islam (read 1, 2) and Hinduism are fundamentally pluralistic faiths. If the couple is truly a pluralist and believes in equality of two faiths, a successful and ever-lasting Hindu-Muslim married life is possible.
Dr. Dilip Amin is a Director of the Peninsula Multifaith Coalition of the San Francisco Bay area, a certified speaker at Islamic Networks Group, and a Dharma Ambassador of the Hindu American Foundation. Dr. Amin has co-authored the book Hindu Vivaha Samskara. He founded the web forum InterfaithShaadi.org and guided 1200 youths and summarized his experiences in the book–Interfaith Marriage: Share & Respect with Equality. He is also the founder of HinduSpeakers.org.
Dr. Mike Mohamed Ghouse is a Social Scientist, Public Speaker, thinker, author, newsmaker, and interfaith wedding officiant. He is deeply committed to Pluralism in Religion, Politics, and Societies along with Human rights, and religious freedom. He is the founder and president of the Center for Pluralism, Director at World Muslim Congress a think tank and a wedding officiant at Interfaith Marriages. His new book American Muslim Agenda is available on Amazon and “Standing up for others” is coming soon. He is committed to building cohesive societies and offers pluralistic solutions on issues of the day.
Mike GhouseComments Off on Interfaith Marriage : Quaker & A Muslim
The Wedding Ceremony took place across the pond, in the barn – the barn is about 30′ tall inside and held about 100 people. The Bride and Groom’s friends represented America and its many races and religions. Indeed, my vision for America is that we all connect and “know” each other. It is my dreamland, and during the sermon, I love to share the essence of the Bride and Groom’s faiths – and the family and friends get to learn about each other’s faith.
Thus far, I have officiated the weddings of Atheists, Christians, Hindus, Jains, Jews, Sikhs, and Muslims, and I hope to officiate Zoroastrian, Native American, Bahai, and Buddhist weddings. I can’t tell you the joy when the guests make a point to tell me that they are happy to learn about their faith. Most of what we know about the others are myths, and through the talk, I gently bust the stereotypes; the more we know in person, the fewer the biases. That is how we build a cohesive America.
I love to learn about different faiths, and I have been learning since I was a teen. Today’s wedding was between a Muslim and a Quaker, and I am close to that faith. We need to start a course 101 in religions through the Center for Pluralism, a non-profit organization. Virginia is gorgeous; you will love it if you go through the countryside and the Shenandoah mountains, especially on country roads. It was a 200 Miles drive to this beautiful resort in Central Virginia. The wedding took place across a pond in a barn that is 30’s tall and well organized. “Interfaith Marriages is dedicated to curating memorable weddings that celebrate the love shared between two partners. Mike’s process begins with a consultation where he can learn about the couple and their story, religious backgrounds, and vision for their Ceremony. He is happy to incorporate special readings, blessings, or traditions into the nuptials or create something unique. Before the wedding day, the future spouses can finalize any details they want to include in their service.”
Mike Ghouse officiates interfaith weddings across America. Please visit https://interfaithmarriages.org/ and for exclusively Muslim weddings, visit http://muslimweddingofficiant.org/
Mike GhouseComments Off on Sikhism Happy Gurgaddi Diwas
On May 23, Guru Hargobind Singh established the Akal Takht, which represents the highest seat of earthly authority of the Khalsa (the collective body of the Sikhs) today.
Gurū Hargobind Singh (19 June 1595 – 28 February 1644), revered as the sixth Nānak, was the sixth of ten Gurus of the Sikh religion. He had become Guru at the young age of eleven, after the execution of his father, Guru Arjan, by emperor Jahangir.
Please note that I write about the essence of every major religious festival; the idea is for us to learn about each other; when we live on the same planet, we had better know each other. It is a good feeling when we are free from biases. The Kings, Monarchs, Presidents, Prime Ministers, and dictators have done wrong things and continue to do it for the lust for power. They come and go, but we have to live in the same space; let’s not hold any grudges against each other.
Mike Ghouse is a public speaker and an author. He is the founder and president of the Center for Pluralism in Washington DC committed to building cohesive societies. Mike offers pluralistic solutions to issues of the day to the policymakers and the media. More about him at www.TheGhouseDiary.com
Mike GhouseComments Off on A Tribute To My Late Wife Najma – A Lifetime Volunteer
Thanks to the outpouring of love from the Dallas Athiest, Bahai, Buddhist, Christian, Hindu, Jain, Jewish, Muslim, Native American, Sikh, Wicca, Zoroastrian, and other communities. Every community was represented, including LGBTQ members. The occasion was celebrating Najma’s celestial journey. Each community mentioned above took turns to sing a hymn in praise of the universal God of us all. When I see these pictures, I feel like going back to Dallas, the hometown that has given me so much love.
Fourteen years ago, she said goodbye to the world with a smile and achieved Mukti, Moksha, Nirvana, Salvation, and Nijat. As you read the story below, you see the beauty in cleaning the slate of life, as the Jains call it, Michami Dukkadam.
I appeal to you to make a point to seek forgiveness for your shortcomings and forgive everyone that has hurt you; yes, please do that. Be it your spouse, parents, children, siblings, relatives, friends, customers, clients, patients, and everyone you know. You will not believe the relief and peace you will find in cleaning the slate of your life.
You will be the clear beneficiary in forgiving others. You will have a smile on your face, free from tensions, free from the samsara. What a relief it is. She and I cleaned our slates prior to her last breath – Life is a poem of Love – https://theghousediary.com/life-is-a-poem-of-love/
Mike GhouseComments Off on Everett Blauvelt – A Father Figure To Me
It was winter of 1977. I was in charge of the Finance Department of Fluor Arabia in Shedgum, Saudi Arabia, and later got promoted and managed five sites from Dhahran. One of them was Uthmaniya – Where Mr. Everett Blauvelt worked. My father passed away in December that year, and he was one person who called me regularly to inquire about the family and me. We became good friends, and he became a father figure to me. His daughter Mary called him Dadski, so I called him Dadski. He called me Mike – then he sponsored me to come to America. I kept the name and made it legal upon becoming a citizen, Mike Mohamed Ghouse. I am here in the United States because of him. Thanks, Dadski. More about https://theghousediary.com/my-name-is-mike-ghouse/
Mike GhouseComments Off on Villains Of Your Children
My friend Todd C wrote this morning, “My wife said something very sobering yesterday in a brief moment before I left to take my six-year-old to Kindergarten. “This may be the last time we see him.”
Do these idiot representatives listed below have a conscience? Do they not care about the kids who are getting killed because they are not their children? Can your children and grandchildren be spared? Does it matter to them?
What will make them wake up and start representing the people who elected them? I will tell you what will wake these corrupt turds like them – get rid of them in the election or Bribe them with more money than the gun lobby. That’s cheap these turds are.
We are seeking the safety of our children; all they have to do is have the courage to tell NRA that they will listen to children and grandchildren and not them. If they lose the bloody election for that, let them loose with dignity. We will give them a hero’s welcome.
Mike GhouseComments Off on Asian Arts At Smithsonian / Freer Gallery Of Arts
Miss Honduras and I have made a list of things to do in Washington DC. This Sunday our trip was to Museums. As we stepped out of the Smithsonian Metro Station, right in front of us was the Freer Gallery. We had no idea what was on display, but a Couple had smiles on their face. I asked them, and they said it was worth visiting. It is about Asian Arts.
There were three sections, Islamic, Indian, and Chinese. We could not see them all, just a glimpse of each one. Most of them alluded to the syncretic cultures of Syria and India. We will walk through it again with a Camera to capture the images.
There is a copy of the Classic Ramayana in color paintings commissioned by King Akbar. Perhaps it was the first time the Epic Ramayana was produced in images. It was a delight to see the Syrian, Egyptian, and Iranian Art from the tenth century. The Museum was closing, and we did not get to see it. We are going back.
